And Thus

I should begin with the blogging commentary from yesterday.
I was really glad to realize by the end of that rationalization process that I have not been writing for the sake of public recognition – but to simply improve my writing skills & quality. After all, it is the words that are delicious and imagery that are ambrosia to me. Yes, “0 comments” means nobody cares. Funnily enough, I don’t care if nobody cares. Because this blog isn’t one of opinion & arguments: it is one of self-enjoyment, perhaps light hedonism, and happiness in absolutely my nihilist attitude towards life.
Yes. Nihilism makes my life much happier.

Second emergent eureka from the past twenty-two hours was that I Had Chosen The Wrong Major. It is not surprising, but somehow depressing because I cannot go back three years to do it again. I cannot turn back, and worse, I do not have the time to wait another three years before I am going out there to start earning money. But I believe journalism and a writing career will begin to unfold soon after I start working. It is a feeling that has a 80% confidence region to become true.
Geek talk.

M came over last night and when I was walking him out to where he parked his car, I told him that I couldn’t wait to move out of this apartment. I did not like the steel structure of it (which, controversial enough, was the reason I moved in. It looked like a filming set to me, I suppose). Everyone knows that after I had seen the comfortability and luxury of Hans’ penthouse sample, that was what I would be aiming for. I am only willing to move upwards. I never go back down to an inferior quality of things. Which, of course when you’re a bankrupt student, could be a bit problematic.
M and I had a really good time last night. It was written all over the joyous boy’s face. You know those smiles that appear when they’re starting to be aroused or excited or surprised by a girl’s behaviour? There was plenty of those. So much that I was even kind of out of appetite.

A girl is always single before she marries.

M also mentioned the fact that he knew there are certain people he just cannot read, despite how much of a good reader he is. I believed it. What he didn’t know was that he had the exact effect on me; and it was when I was trying to knock down that “unreadability” in him that I realized what I had been missing in my life: the innocent diligence I once had towards so many things. Therefore, as long as I’m with him, he will make me a better person as a reminder. Plus by default, I love his character anyway.
“You like me because I’m lazy,” he smiled and said.
“No.” I replied. “You’re more naughty.”
“Yea, and you love it.”

No comment.

By this morning, a Thursday morning, I had finished the psychology lecture at 10a.m. regardless of that fact that it wasn’t right for me. Then I spent the rest of the day writing essays, and even walked all the way to Starbucks just for a cup of coffee. I knew at least the quality wouldn’t disappoint me. And there was a line of ten or eleven students that queued all the way outside the door. Starbucks has commercialized well.

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